Saturday, 1 October 2022

Strange Day Reloaded

It’s been quite a month for family/clan stuff.

Before it start re-telling it I would like to offer my sorrow, thoughts and prayers to the family of ChuckInBama who passed away not long after posting on the previous blog post here.

I read the news over at Glen’s place and from there it seems Phil @ Bustedknuckles knew him and his wife.  He wasn’t old (only a few years older than I) and it came out of the blue 

While I only had the pleasure of corresponding with him recently I liked his viewpoint.  He was well respected on the other blogs and all remember him fondly.  I would have loved to share a few glasses with him in person.  I will raise one tonight in his honour and add his name the roll call in my prayers.

Sadly not long after hearing of CIB’s passing my wife received news that her biological mother had passed away.

That’s a strange relationship name but my wife was adopted and she reached out about 10 years ago to find her biological mother.  We found her as well as 2 sisters and brothers.  Her name was Frances.

Frances was never going to be mum as another had already filled that role but it was very rewarding for my wife to make the connection. I think we helped Frances with having made that previous decision by finding her again.  Sadly Frances was diagnosed with liver cancer in February. 

We made a trip back over to Scotland for one last visit in March.  From personal past experience my wife and I knew what was coming for the siblings.  The focus should be on the core family and not the recent add in’s.

The service is on Monday coming.  We can’t be there without being a burden on the family so it’s getting streamed on-line.  This is new since the chinky pox.  We hope they can now put the recent horror and pain behind them.  May it let the proper grieving and healing begin 

My Aunt’s one month’s minding Mass was last weekend.  It’s a Catholic thing here – not sure if it’s universal.  By complete coincidence, at the same time a dozen cousins from Scotland were over in Belfast visiting for the first time as a clan get together/reunion.  Don’t ask me to describe all the family tree stuff.

We had been out for a meal at the Belfast Felons Social Club (look it up for a laugh) the night before to make introductions and break the ice. Great meal by the way.  We Micks like our food and are fussy about quality and quantity.  Seriously, we eat like horses when we get the chance.

After the Mass everyone headed back to my Aunt’s daughter’s house which was about 300 yards away from the church. This is the Falls Road after all.  Gallons of tea and coffee and thanks to my cousin and her husband – food.

We finally had a good chance for the usual family and the new ‘cousins’ to get a good blather and catch up.  That when my wife and I discovered a bomb shell of a discovery from the Glasgow connection.

To set this up, my wife has some of her adoption papers.  In it, her birth father was identified only by a few clues.  Frances gave up few details but at a wedding back in Scotland previously of one of Frances’s granddaughters we picked up the titbit that he had been killed in a gangland killing in Glasgow with some other stuff.

Charming stuff but we still had little to go on.  While my wife is curious about her father (definitely not her dad) she has no desires to make contact.  However, knowing how Glasgow is run by certain families she asked a question and the bomb dropped.

It still blows my mind but in the space of a 10 minutes chat we had narrowed it down to 2 possible matches.  One dead and the other alive but untraceable!!!!!

We did learn that Glasgow – once the murder capital of Europe – was a far more dangerous place than Belfast to go up in.

In Belfast you might get shot dead or blown up but it’s nothing personal – it’s just bad luck/timing and politics.  In Glasgow saying the wrong thing to a stranger could be fatal.  3 of the men in the group had brothers murdered.  Fuck me!!

Nothing more has come of this so far and probably won’t.  I have always heard of jokes where someone would say – oh you’re from Belfast do you know XXX?  Only in Glasgow would it be true.

I’m not sure how the US or other visitors will view this.  As you hear online local, local, local.  While family comes with its own issues it has its own strengths.

Family/clan is the key to survival.  Blood is thicker than water.  My son does not carry my DNA but he is mine and it was accepted by the clan at his wedding.  All my dad’s brothers have acknowledged it as does my son.

To my brothers from other mothers – ie you foreigners LOL.  You’ll know when you are made to feel at home.  I really wished for longer with CIB and I know when I get up there we’ll catch up properly. 

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